It’s okay not to ‘like’ your kids
We know you love them, that’s some strange biological given, but at times they do annoy you so much that you find it really hard to like them… This is okay!
Every parent has been there and continues to go there often – sometimes it lasts for an afternoon, other times it can go on for a lot longer. I think it’s only something to worry about if it is happening more often than not.
When they are babies you will have periods where they scream and cry constantly (or so it feels). This noise intrusion into your world, added to being so damn tired thanks to sleepless nights, will make you feel very angry and annoyed with your little bundle of joy. Take a break – that’s right, put the baby in a safe place and step back for a minute or two so that you can calm down a little. If it is too much, ask a relative, friend or partner to just give you some time to go for a walk and gain a sense of calm.
As they get older, they will push back on your rules and stand defiantly against you – this too will push your buttons and you might even find yourself saying it allowed ‘I don’t like you’ – again get some balance. Take a break, let them have a long playdate at a friend’s house so you can find yourself again; have a bitch with mates who are going through similar experiences with their children… a problem shared, is a problem halved!
Now as they reach teenager years and young adulthood – I can assure you some days you will look at them and think, where has this creature come from!? Guess what, it came from you – but relax it will pass if you just give yourself time to step back.
The message here is clear and simple with this one… you will have days where you children piss you off so much you will not like them, you might even have feelings of regret that you bothered at all, it’s okay to feel like this but please take some time to step back and regain your composure and inspiration. If the feelings seem to last then I’d encourage you to talk with professionals about these feelings and thoughts…
NB: First published at The Poppet Centre